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Don’t Let Them Quit


“A child born of the fire, will not suffer the heat of life.”
– Victor Marx


Recently, I was listening to a podcast during my morning workout as I often do, and I heard a quote that struck me to my absolute core.  This quote gave words to the work I have done all these years with my students and why we are so passionate about how we serve our students.  This quote by Victor Marx while speaking about his horrific upbringing has stuck with me ever since because it is truly based in truth.

“A child born of the fire (or put through the fire) will not suffer the heat of life.”

So let me explain…

As many of our students are aware, our Black Belt tests are tremendously challenging, but not only is the test itself extremely difficult, but the process to qualify for the test is long and arduous.  As a matter of fact, we often say that when a student is testing for their Black Belt, they are “put through the fire.”  This is to illustrate that the process of becoming a Black Belt is not supposed to be easy; it is supposed to change us at our very core.  As they say, the strongest metal is forged in the hottest fire.  So, too is our understanding of ourselves.

When we go through adversity, we learn what we are truly capable of accomplishing, so long as we do not quit.  The harder the task, the more worthwhile the outcome.  Additionally, when we persevere through challenges, we learn how to keep our heads up and push ourselves.  We learn that we cannot be beaten unless we give up.

A common thread I hear from parents of students here at Crabapple Martial Arts Academy, is that a student has “lost interest” or that they don’t have the “passion” for it, or some other false flag.  Through my 30+ years of experience, in nearly 100% of cases, it is because the student is having to do something hard.  It is common psychology for humans to look for the easy way through life.  Efficiency is often the buzz word of the day.  But it is just a reluctance to be uncomfortable and persevere.

Our job as parents is to guide our children to be amazing adults.  We are called to teach our children how to not only manage life but thrive in life without us.  Be strong independent humans.  In order to succeed at this monumental task, we must not allow our children to quit.  We must allow them to suffer through adversity while they are young and can learn how to cope and manage stress.  This also teaches the children how to persevere and see things through.

When we allow a child to quit, we are teaching them that when something becomes challenging, you can quit and move on.  The problem with this is we end up with young adults with a trail behind them of incomplete pursuits and having never learned what it takes to succeed in life.

Finally, and the most important aspect of this, when a child goes through adversity, such as a Black Belt test, or a challenging teacher at school, they learn how to cope and overcome challenges.  These lessons are so important because life is full of challenges that, as parents, we must prepare our children to overcome.  If we rob them of this adversity, then we are robbing our children of learning how to cope with life’s many challenges and disappointments.

I wish you all success and happiness in life.  Remember we cannot see the rainbow without enduring the storm first.

See you on the mat,

Renshi Matt and Crabapple Martial Arts Academy has been selected the nation’s #1 martial arts schools for SIX YEARS IN A ROW by the American Budokai International!

Founded in 2013 by Mr. C. Matthew White a 5th degree Black Belt in Karate and 6th degree Black Belt in Jiu Jitsu, and Master Instructor, Crabapple Martial Arts and Karate lessons for pre-school children ages 4-6, and elementary age kids ages 7 and up, are designed to develop the critical building blocks kids need – specialized for their age group – for school excellence and later success in life.

Crabapple Martial Arts Adult Karate training is a complete adult fitness and conditioning program for adults who want to lose weight, get (and stay) in shape, or learn self-defense in a supportive environment.

Instructors can answer questions or be contacted 24 hours a day, 7 days a week at or call directly at 770-645-0930. You can also visit our website at

About C. Matthew White, Renshi:  Matt is a fifth-degree black belt in a traditional Japanese and Okinawan Martial Arts – Shuri Ryu Karatedo. He is also a sixth-degree black belt in Japanese Jiu Jitsu – Shintoyoshin Kai Jiu Jitsu, and a master instructor with the title of Renshi, which means Scholar in Japanese.  Matt has a bachelor’s degree in Exercise and Sports Physiology. He has been training and teaching martial arts for over 27 years and has owned Crabapple Martial Arts Academy since 2013. Renshi White is a motivational speaker and educator and teaches seminars in bullying, business, and martial arts training, around the world.

Crabapple Martial Arts Academy Headquarters is in Alpharetta, Georgia at 12315 Crabapple Road., Suite 124, Alpharetta GA 30004. You can locate the Chief Instructor, Sensei Robert Reed there or directly at (770) 645-0930.